a culture of sadness

i turn on the egyptian channel
yet i am in california
and oh my God
the soap opera
the mother is crying holding her daughter
saying words that could not be translated in english

our culture in egypt is so sad
sadness is just our way and the common ground
yes there is humor
but the overriding feeling is sadness

sadness is a culture in egypt
even after the joy of the revolution all i could do was cry for the martyrs

in california people are not afraid to say they are happy
maybe its because they really are

the government makes sure most of them are
they can walk around
they have pavements
sidewalks
they have trees
they have parks around every neighborhood so the people can enjoy

they have rights
they feel like human beings like they are worthy
and at the coffee house the stranger opens the door for me and gives me his place in line

he says you go first
i thought everything was a struggle and here everyone is being nice
a new movement here started by a local called daymaking
which is an attempt to make a strangers day and do something nice for no rewards other than a desire in a better world
so its like paying it forward everyone is trying to make everyone else's day
walking down the street i am greeted by nice people who wish me a great day

in egypt the beggars only wish me stuff and they want money
they say may God keep you
i once told a beggar but i don't wanna just be around, pray something better like God bless you or wish me happiness or anything who says i wanna just be around forever

here in california
in the street
there are
smiling people
full of hope
and its a happy culture

back home we are mostly sad
traffic can steal any joy out of us
everyone is out there to share the misery
we have even grown closer in misery
because we have it as a common feeling

and we have no idea what is next
our government is capable of screwing us over to the limit that we can not imagine
we have zero trust
we are traumatized
we took our lives into our own hands

we are so happy when we see a policeman
we wanna dance in joy that they decided to work again

when we travel we always say what a clean place
because it not that clean in our street
but cleanliness is like a given everywhere else

and then again i look around and i feel the joy of the people here
yes many have gone mad and walk around yelling stuff but the majority are happy motivated and hopeful

the egyptians are like orphans
the government has abandoned them so those of them who can went and tried to get adopted by those who value their children
canada and america

everyone wants dual citizenships
because another passport gives you more humanity
your price goes up

until the revolution came along and now saying im egyptian here in california tastes so much better
thanks to tahrir square we have a better name here and everywhere

but what exactly is going on back home i dont know
all i know is that i wanna say im egyptian here and it feels way better than saying it last year

but our culture is a sad one and it might be an eastern thing that the tears flood like waterfalls
my people have seen so much injustice and pain and neglect its only normal to be so sad
even if you are rich having poor and sick people around you will depress you
having so much ignorance and sickness and poverty around you is bound to get you down

we are stuck with so much love to our land
love that hurts
love that makes us sad
love that makes us come back
they say build and we will
but its the sadness that will take so much time to erase and the trust that will take ages to build
and the people who need new bodies new skins new minds to start fresh and to forget the ways they have been treated


we take everything into our hands
because we have zero faith in our government
we keep trying to live in a place that is just perfect for dying

but there is hope and life will go on


maybe its an arabian thing to carry sadness within
ours is a culture of sadness