keep your head up

keep your head up high
do not let them bring you down
do not let them ride you
you are not a free ride
do not underestimate me
do not think you can own me just because of my smile
yes i am fun but that does not mean i am easy for you to boss around
you might misunderstand the fact that i am kind
i see beyond your shallow facade
i see you and how dark you are inside


some people think they can fake who they are
but nobody is dumb we all know what they are about
the good are good the bad are bad
act like you would like to be treated

dave chapel once said in a stand up comedy "if you are dressed like a policemen expect people to treat you like one, when people ask you for help you cant say just because i am dressed like a policemen does not make me one"
so it goes for every way you like to present yourself
our exteriors are our ways to show the world what we want them to think of us

class is what so many people lack
and what annoys me most is people who do not respect the people around them thinking they are smarter
and they can fool them

my friends are those i love and we have no motives
my friends and i we go way back
u cant press a button and turn me into one of your friends

be strong stand up for your self i tell the girls like me

to the fake, the bossy, the abusive and the unfair you are all transparent
i can see through you
stay away and do not steal all my trademarks turning them into yours
copy cats can be creepy
coming too close too fast
so do not tell me what i can or can not do


keep your head up
do not let anyone laugh at your dreams
do not let them put you down
with words or chuckles
only the insecure make you doubt your self
you are clean, pure and a being of light let the dark ones fade away
only your inner eye will see things clearly
and you will know who is using you
who is fake
who is real
who is good
good people are so hard to find but they are here
somewhere with no question marks over their haeds


keep your head up
be strong
the power of the universe is inside you
with God on your side then who could ever stand in your way
yes you can break free
say no
and let them go
keep your heart first
and never let them pass the barrier
no stepping on me
no stepping on you
i broke free and now i found my self again
it feels great to fly and to touch my core again
after someone comes between you and yourself
you need to keep them away


you want to be me?
you can only be you
stay away
i am whole alone
i need no one
i believe in me
and God is inside me

i will keep my head up
because its good to be me

gender anger

i hold a grudge against the male gender
i just realized how the ride can be easy for him
he rules, he drives, he speaks louder most of the time
he can get away with so much
oh mom you raised me so well you hid the truth about being a girl so well
i had no idea about the gender wars
only recently did i know that my father wanted a boy
never did he show it
and never did i understand why like tonight
i did not know about all the abuse girls go through for being girls
you blinded me about the fact that in many places i am second class
because i am not a he
you did not tell me some people expect me to shut up because i'm a woman
growing up in an american school they fooled me showing me life through a free world
i could speak my mind back then, i could question anyone, speak proudly and raise my head high
but today i have come to realize that the women of the world bare so much more than their fellow men
especially in the third world that i am from
other than the process of life that they brought us to this world through
and the nurturing that is often life long
and the realm of emotions that they can feel and most men do not even know about
always beautiful always strong
always faithful always smiling
through the pains of unshed tears
so much pressure to be beautiful to be cute and to be innocent
the egyptian culture expects a girl to be stupid and obedient fun and most of the time silent.
a smart girl is not so happy here because she must act dumb to keep him proud
a strong girl has to cover her strength and be dependent and fragile
to be a girl you must be scared to be accepted you must seem weak
you must shut up and blend in,
keep your voice low and always be the little girl who stares at the world and leaves him to lead the ride

my angel said

my angel came and told me a poem
as i opened my eyes
the angel said:
u say you need all the help
and that your world has come to an end
you ask the whole world for advice
and still you miss the point of the test
you believe your fellow friends
you believe your elderly
you believe the voices on earth
but you never listened to the beloved

you still have not asked him for help
you are still too proud to kneel and beg
your tears are so rare and your world is so
small.

you still did not turn to him, he who brought the world to a start
he who knows you more than you know your own self

my angel said God promised to answer the prayers of those who pray
yet still you refuse to ask him for help
and you believe the promises of everyone else
if your creator promised you something
you should know it is for sure and that anything else is maybe

my angel told me no matter how much people pray for me it won't do much
i need to pray for my self
no one else can break the code

my angel told me through love, openings will show
and the sufis way is through deep love of the prophet
my angel told me to disappear in the love of the prophet
my angel told me openings will appear from where i had no clue

as my angel spoke i could see forms and lights surround us both
and the way we met was only a message from God
my angel was one of us
she is an educator a professor a Dr. at the american university of cairo
seeing her you would never have guessed that she is a seeker of light
a lover of the prophet and a sufi with a heart as clear and pure as the angels above
she looks like anyone of us in modern clothes and no veils or pretenses
she was the toughest teacher in school
and her three hour class passed like a glimpse every time
she pushed us to reach higher levels
she made us cry and laugh at once and in the end we would accomplish work we did not know we can ever create
never have i met a better teacher with a divine aura that made you respect every bit of her
and realize how precious her time is.
she inspires, she pushes, she teaches, she is what every teacher dreams of being, and what every student seeks for in a teacher.



God bless you Dr. Youmna S
my favorite and most amazing teacher and mentor of all time

love and light

your former student
mennah

the time for us is now

it is our time to make our dreams come true
nobody is sitting on their ass anymore
the world is going through a revolution
the young are making it
free they break the rules
with talent or an idea the sky is the limit
im so proud of us my generation
is out there doing it
the wedding is not it for the girls anymore
everyone is making something
selling
showing
they are all out there
we are all there
making it
dream big because dreams come true

Arabic Songs (Eng. Subs) Kifak Inta كيفك إنت

Michael Jackson " I just can't stop Loving you"

shakiras gypsy

Broke my heart
On the road
Spent the weekend
Sewing the pieces back on

Friends and thoughts pass me by
Walking gets too boring
When you learn how to fly

Not the homecoming kind
Take the top off
And who knows what you might find

Won't confess all my sins
You can bet I'll try it
But You can't always win


Chorus

'Cause I'm a gypsy
Are you coming with me?
I might steal your clothes
And wear them if they fit me
I never made agreements
Just like a gypsy
And I won't back down
'Cause life's already bit me
And I won't cry
I'm too young to die
If you're gonna quit me
'Cause I'm a gypsy

('Cause I'm a gypsy)


Verse 2

I can't hide
what I've done
Scars remind me
Of just how far that I've come
To whom it may concern
Only run with scissors
When you want to get hurt

Chorus
'Cause I'm a gypsy
Are you coming with me?
I might steal your clothes
And wear them if they fit me
I don't make agreements
Just like a gypsy
And I won't back down
'Cause life's already bit me
And I won't cry
I'm too young to die
If you're gonna quit me
'Cause I'm a gypsy

I said hey you
You're no fool
If you say 'NO'
Ain't it just the way life goes?
People fear what they don't know
Come along for the ride, Oh yeah
Come along for the ride, whoo-hoo

'Cause I'm a gypsy
Are you coming with me?
I might steal your clothes
And wear them if they fit me
Never made agreements
Just like a gypsy
And I won't back down
'Cause life's already bit me
And I won't cry
I'm too young to die
If you're gonna quit me
'Cause I'm a gypsy

some show

watching glee the new show that i am addicted to is like a trip to heaven and back

if you did not watch this show and you are into music you have to start

watching it im on cloud number 9

joy is what it is

the making of joy

that is entertainment

not like the shows with people dying and tragic plots that torture your heart and break it by your own choice

i refuse to volunteer my own torture with sad shows

glee is the making of joy

glee is a spiritual fun experience

it is witty

it is artistic

the cast is so talented its like going to Broadway every night but you are in your pj's on your own coach and broadway comes home to you

i love glee

it is my joy

i wish i was in the glee club

i want to sing and dance on stage

glee: now that is talent

open your heart

open ur mind

open ur heart

open ur soul

open ur spirit

open ur arms

open up like a lotus flower

its all you need

to be free and for the universe to give you what you need

follow your dream

work hard

have fun doing it

lose your self and find it in the end

be like the bird

your dream will come true

and do not let them laugh at your dreams

every great thing was first a dream

lose your fear

don't listen to your mind

it will bring you down

follow your heart

and fly away into the sky

joy will find you

watch the children and play like them

life is the biggest playground

the show will go on

"the joys of the mystics" in safarkhan zamalek,

6 brazil street

look up their website

my art is hanging there waiting for u to c

if ur not in cairo enjoy this blog

tomorrow is judgement day

tomorrow is my judgement day

my little babies will hang on the wall

my loved pieces are not with me anymore

they went to the gallery

they are ready to see the world

they will meet strangers for the first time

the joys of the mystics

the work is ready to be judged and to communicate

every piece is dear is loved

every piece is from my all

i should be scared and anxious

but as they say i am comfortably numb

what is done is done

and this is it for me

what happens next is not up to me

my part is done

the rest is up to the work to perform

to touch people or not

to speak or to sleep

but i miss my work

pieces of me are out to be judged

tomorrow is judgement day

its so close now

may 17th is so close now

closer than ever

it came rushing and did not wait

they said if you believe in yourself great things happen

they said if you commit to something it commits back and brings results

they said inspiration looks for the working people to come

they said give it your all and it will give you back

working on my last piece

painting it like i do not want it to end

who knows what will happen next

who knows anything

enjoy the moment that is now

that is free from agony

life can be great

possibilities are every where

life can surprise you

why do we meet the people we meet

we run in circles and we lose so many along the way

always be ready who knows who you will meet

and only when you give the most you can in something can someone fall in love with you

let it consume you whatever you can

we are spiritual beings whirling in the universe waiting to catch the light

why do we prefer mediocracy when we know we are great and divine

why do we run away from the divine when he brought us here

some people prefer to crawl through life and keep things simple

saying a tree is just a tree a house is just a house thinking there are no souls to the things

thinking life is just a coincidence

but we prefer the magical life where we can see the colors that the ordinary can not

where we can see the dancers in the trees and we can see the leaves as they breath

the bird in remembrance

the tigress chasing life

the grace of a swan

the majesty of a lion

and the kingdom of heaven

it is so close now making it seem like dreams do come true

marriage

marriage is an institution designed to make single women uncomfortable and anxious

and married women too available and boring

one of the most important attractions in a woman is her mystery and marriage kills that,

turns her into a buddy by time

marriage is a place where expectations are hard to meet and women are always disappointed

marriage is a holy bond if not handled with sacredness can create disasters

marriage is an experiment where two beings from different worlds guess what each of them has in mind

marriage creates unhealthy attachments that end up in a partner being choked and another heart broken

marriage makes all the other women seem more desirable for they are the unknown and unseen for men

marriage is a wonderful celebration that brings people together

marriage is a place where your outline blurs into another and you end up confused

marriage is a system with roles and games and twisted ways you must have the keys to survive

men are in the limelight ever after the wedding ceremony

men are the winners of the leading role

women are the extras

have women displayed themselves as purchasable objects to the extent that going to a bar for a man becomes very close to visiting the supermarket?

have women revealed so much to the extent that men see them as objects?

i wonder if eve has brought her self to this position by making her body seem cheap and objectified

have men become the main characters

or have they always been?

back home with their families most girls are stars

and suddenly they become a thing that someone chose

a toy most men are bored with by time

routine kills romance and marriages are about that

marriage is what every girl dreams about

and it is a winning industry

women are not food

egyptian men say can you eat the same food every day?

even if its caviar?

it is their excuse to cheating

why could women eat the same food everyday if men can not?

prostitutes have ruined it for the female population

made women become purchasable

why do women mistake showers of love with ideal romance

when all men need is a fraction of women's love so they can breathe

most men say women are crazy for their emotional ways

i say men have lost so much emotion on the ladder of corporate success

gullible men look for interested women to feed their egos

stupid women love too much and let their hearts torture them

be inspired

http://www.mythinglinks.org/NearEast~3monotheisms~Islam~Rabia.html

inner monologue

its crawling up on me

a date on a calendar can become so big in your head

all the other days fade away

only one day is highlighted

only one day is big in your heart

you wait

you anticipate

you forget everyone and everything else

you wish all those who put you down would come

all those you love would be there to support you

every time you accomplish something its to make your dearest ones proud and to shove it in the face of those who said you wont make it and that your ways are not welcomed in the world

being a freak is not so bad

being slightly mad brings out the new in you

it is great not to be another clone of the crowd

be yourself there is no way you are a photocopy

everyone thinks they are king

everyone thinks they know it all and that you do not know

do not listen to them

you know so much, you know it inside ,dig deeper

unleash the dragon inside

capable of everything

you know things you did not think about

you are great i tell you

just stop being so afraid of what they say

they know nothing anyway

they are boring

they are judgmental

they are cowards

and behind their cold smiles and greetings are extremely insecure souls

in silence i have found my true self

i have found God in the silence and in the eyes of my loved ones

the little ones are the spring time of this life

it is God giving us joy through listening to their giggles

their little feet and their voices

inspiration is everywhere

just open your eyes or close them and listen to you heart for a change

when u make art

when u make art u gotta forget about what the people will say

only when u do can u create the best out of you

my exhibition is coming up may 17

days away and viewers will either love or hate my work

but it will not matter much what they say

because what is important is doing what u love and someway somehow it will be appreciated

first i was terrified if they hated it

then i broke free and only then did they believe in it

this time it is completely me, nothing to hide what is inside

the mirror of the heart is what it is

the sufis way

yes art is an expression of who you are

colors can speak louder than words sometimes

but i wish i was not only a painter

i wish i was a singer

i wish i was an actress

i wish i was an opera dancer

i wish i was a song writer

i wish i lived on stage and back stage

i wish i could bring back the time when i was involved in theatre

i wish it was easier to embrace the arts in cairo

it is actually not

society is harsh that way

does not let you do what you want

so many barriers

so many rules not to break

so many unspoken laws

thank God i can paint

thank God i can show the world

thank God its ok to make art in this society

even writing here on this blog has been frowned upon

so many limits

so many barriers

when the only one who can judge us is God

who says art is sinful

there is no gift more precious than the gift of music

than the gift of colors

than art

art is my oxygen

i don't care what they say i will keep making art

if they call me a fool

if they call me mad

so many have been called and who cares

when you make art you must shut their voices down and be free

missing you

some people are used to missing their loved ones

i am not

it might be my parent's fault they kept me too close

since then i learned to cling hard to the people i love

i am not used to goodbyes and i hate them

days pass like years and no one understands

i studied here in cairo

i worked here in cairo all my life i have been close to my dearest ones

i am not used to missing my loved ones

i learned something today

when you start crying so hard get up and move, the shift of movement simplifies your pain

the worst thing you can do is stay in the same place, the sadness adds and adds until it wins over you

low blood pressure does not help either

after crying a lot drink a lot of fluids for you have been dehydrated by the massive tears

surround your self by happy strong cheerful people avoid those who are like you at hard times, the vulnerable or sad bring you down more

try to get used to the feelings

detach your self

adapt to change

that is the hardest of them all

every body leaves you in the end i told my self so be strong and let go

nothing is forever, nothing is yours, nothing stays.

this world is not real i told my heart, this world is not real i repeated.

and with the colors of my brushes i lost myself behind the canvas and forgot about my dripping tears

we all hurt i am not ashamed of that but i want to be independent like people who lived on their own abroad

i am not them, all i can do is remember the divine and keep busy with art after all its makes life worth living, and too much missing can drain you.

fear : my enemy

every time my wings begin to form and i'm about to fly, fear brings me down

time after time i realized who is my biggest enemy, fear is

i try to shove it down and it rises

i try to act all tough and it comes back why should i fear a life not mine?

fear haunts my dreams haunts me and destroys all the good that comes my way

i wish i would not be scared anymore i wish i was bigger than my fears

someone once asked what would you do if you were not afraid?

the answer is all that is wonderful

fear destroys love

fear depresses people

fear kills joy fear pulls me back from reaching the skies

all these nightmarish scenarios came from fear

all these times i did not say what i felt, that too was fear

i will not hurt no one but i will not be afraid to say the truth

the truth feels great to say

i hate you fear

go away do not stay here in this body of mine you are not welcomed

my fear and my mind they gang up on me and paralyze me

how i hate them both

after a short time i push them out

i phase them out

with love and joy i can win this war inside

fear brought me sickness

fear brought me sadness

fear you are a weak existence all you aim for is bringing us down

no i don't want to be afraid anymore

if i were a boy

i would not think so much

keep my life simple

i would not analyze or even theorize

i would do what i want

even if it hurt the crowd

i would be a free bird

no tears would tie me down

i would be a typical guy

if i were a boy